[Image is not my own, for original photo content ‘click here‘.]
I find glamour in the darkness
When I look to the sky
And see the stars gleaming
They teach me how to dance
When they fall
They fall like rain drops
When I dance
They feel like fireworks
[I do not own the rights to the photo above, ‘click here‘ for original content].
They tell me I’m beautiful.
“I am so jealous of your legs”.
They don’t know,
It scares me,
They never brush against each other.
They tell me I’m lucky.
“You are so tall”.
They don’t know,
I was made to be taller
but my back,
They tell me I look like a model.
“You are so skinny”.
They don’t know,
I feel so weak,
I tremble and shake.
For goodness sake,
I’m skin and bones and wide awake.
[I do not own any rights to the photo above, ‘click here‘ for link to art.]
No-one knows me,
I’m hiding behind a face.
Faking emotions on a daily base.
smiling, why thank you!
Laughing, oh Sir.
Sitting here writing this f*cking poetry blurb.
Can you not see through these eyes?
Can you not see through my deep blue lurk?
I question you,
Have you had nice day?
And then you yell,
Please look this way,
“I’ll pray for you with all my faith!”
Sick from worry.
Anxious in my chest.
My chest is in my stomach.
My stomachs turning round.
Life’s quite short, so please don’t frown.
I’m new in town,
this here’s not my own throne.
To you I’m known, to others I’m not.
So rest your head, against your chest.
And let poor sorrow go.
Tomorrow we will know, tomorrow we will go.
This place is magic, this place inside my head.
The place where my dreams prosper.
The place old dreams lay dead.
Sunshine and daisies, magical lands.
Unicorns, butterflies and childlike trends.
Bipolar minds live bipolar lives.
So many dreams, not enough time.
I know that I’m genuine, and I know that I’m kind.
Please mommy tell me, is it you that I’m like?
Or is it my dad, ’cause I know he’s sick too ?
But that’s a new story I wont get into.
I know you’re both sorry, and don’t be ashamed.
Mom, you raised a good daughter.
Dad, she thinks she’s to blame.
For my fears and my worries but we’re on the same page – of the book, near the ending where she carries the flame.
Whisper I love you, as the hairs on the back of my neck stand up and the chills run down my crooked spine.
What I’m about to tell you might be tough but i’m sure as hell not alone in this story of mine.
Whisper I love you, the tickle of your breath in my ear.
I’m in pain and I’m lying there scared,
but I know that with you, I have nothing to fear.
Your dark blue sheets clenched in between my knuckles,
the same knuckles I would punch you with only 6 months later.
And I’m sorry, I was in pain, I lost our baby, I knew after that I could never be carefree again like I used to be.
Whisper I love you, as you bend down and touch your palm to my face.
Even though my heart was sinking in my chest you had me feeling calm.
But I wiped my tears on your face anyways just because I wanted you to feel my pain.
And you could because we were connected.
Like two kindred souls in the wind.
Believe what you want but I believe in old souls and I believe that we’ve been lovers in past lives.
So you hold me so close and I can smell your cologne and follow your heartbeat and you lean in and you whisper I love you one last time as we choose to move on and live our lives.